ALBUM REVIEWS

Sheila Grace HEART OF GOLD EP SELF RELEASED OUT NOW @www.vanguard-online.co.uk Ouch! This is the worst thing I’ve heard all year! We get sent all sorts here at Vanguard Online; screamo bands from the Welsh valleys, emos from the suburbs, metal from nowhere and bar bands from Ohio but Sheila Grace manages to suck and blow at the same time. She’s an Austrian lass who has a powerful voice and absolutely no idea how to use it or what to use it on. If only she had someone to tell her, “Oi, Sheila, don’t make a twat of yourself”. But her piano accompanist soldiers on in the idea that they are creating Jim Steinman-era Meatloaf ballads. Its vaguely possible she might sound good if she let rip in front of some loud and speedy rock but she sings painfully (and I mean painfully) slowly and carefully, still making a horrible noise. We suffer for you – I skipped through the tracks looking for a good one, reached the end, failing to find one then listened all the way through. By thirty seconds into the second track I was fighting an impulse to wander out of the room until it finished. The material is insipid and hackneyed – mind you, I’d not be much cop in writing lyrics in German – but then I’m not forcing reviewers to endure my record. Her voice flies up and down, screeching and missing notes and all the time I’m trying not to turn it off and throw it away. Sheila, love, we try not to waste resources these days – how about you save some plastic and don’t press up any more discs. Ross McGibbon www.sheilagrace.net Email Links & Comments to the editor Check the latest album releases